Roast your insides?

Ok. So I've been going to the inside-roasting bed for a few days now. Each year I vow to myself I will not get back in that wrinkle/dark spot causing, dead skin smelling, cornea burning tunnel of bright lights and year after year, I return. I make excuses for myself like, "but if I don't go, then I will fry on vacation" (true story) or "I need some vitamin d." I even go as far as to tell my people how horrible it is for your body and they should lay off. So guess what. That makes me a hypocrite. Now don't get me wrong. Some people really take that bed of bulbs a bit far. Freakishly tan YEAR ROUND or for our entire friendship is a bit much. They know who they are. But, I'll admit, there is just something about the place that draws me back visit after visit, 6 minutes after 6 minutes (I can't imagine the condition my skin would be in if I actually stayed the entire 20... Sheesh!). Maybe it is the smell of the "tanning" lotion or the question mark surrounding the color of my skin upon departure of Tan-N-Go. Golden brown or embarrassingly burnt (usually a nice crimson color...hey, it sorta turns into tanish color). I guess the point I am trying to make is I still hold out hope each year that this, my friends, will be my summer to tan. So assuming my insides don't fry and I don't get crows feet, this could be my summer! But on the bright side, no matter what tan (sometimes orange)complexion my Mystic spray might give me, it'll always be there for me, keeping me melanoma free!